| 10.5°C Belfast

How to sound sexy

Every time I get a cold, particularly with a sore throat, I phone round my female friends. Pourquoi? To get advice? Hell, no, I don't want told to pull myself together.

No, it's to impress them with my deep, gravelly voice. Normally I sound like a pixie on helium. But, with a good virus, I sound like Lee Marvin after a shot of moonshine whisky. That's why, if I hear anyone has a cold, I go round and cuddle them or ask if I can use their fork. Deep voices are desperately cool.

Thatcher (no titles or other names where I come from) famously lowered her voice to sound less of a bitch. That worked, right enough. She was right, though. A new study claims voters prefer candidates with deeper, more masculine voices. I suppose it sounds more grounded, though the researchers (from McMaster University, Canada), warbled about it indicating leadership, survival skill, and reproductive capacity.

Over-egging the pud, I fancy, though it could explain why women - essentially slaves of biology and the overriding need to reproduce the species - go weak at the kneelobes on hearing a sonorous voice from the depths.

You can read more about this story in the journal Evolution and Human Behaviour, available at your local supermarket.