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Why we all behave like Neanderthals at times

Neanderthals have been much in the news recently, which is odd, since they were never in the news when they were alive.

The latest research claims the controversial sub-species interbred with humans 50,000 years ago, which explains the behaviour of some people on a Saturday night. The result is that any one of us contains between one and four per cent of Neanderthal DNA.

It's funny how they were the first to leave Africa, followed by homo sapiens — ultimately the most successful ape — 300,000 years later.

Pretty good argument for the cautious approach, I feel, or for bunging someone else out in front to explore. It may be the Neanderthal part of us, incidentally, that abhors brussels sprouts.

Even more research — does it never stop? — found they had a sense of bitter taste that protected them from ingesting toxic substances. Let no one ever again cast doubt on the good sense of these hairy-buttocked losers.

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