Spotted wearing a red top and a look that screams ‘come and get me and, er, read me’, it’s the real ho in the Wayne Rooney prostitute scandal.
Not the hookers themselves, you understand, but that other slapper selling herself on every street corner every day — the newspaper.
For, in time honoured ‘shoot the messenger’ tradition, we have reached that critical point in the Wayne and Coleen love story, where we’re being told it was the medja that did it.
It’s not really about how Wayne’s turned into a serial prostitute user who cheated on his pregnant wife.
No, according to a statement from the couple appealing for privacy, it’s about the “media glare”, and the “so many inaccurate and intrusive stories”.
Inaccurate? How? Privacy? Don’t make me laugh! But if it’s what you really want then nothing could be simpler. It’s all in your own hands, darlings.
Stop selling multiple-page spreads about your happy family life to Hello! and stay off our TV screens flogging your image as a ‘down-to-earth couple’.
You see, the ‘media glare’ is fine by them as long as the only thing printed is what they approve of. Bring it on, in that case, the more (pound notes) the merrier.
But anything which tells the truth, as usual, is ‘hurtful’ and an invasion of privacy.
I’ll bet it is. It’s called a free press. Live by the sword, die by the sword.