BBC must be on another planet Strange reporting: BBC's HQ
Imagine a visiting alien watching the BBC news this week. The top story is of a 90-year-old man who's had minor surgery and spent a few nights in the most luxurious hospital in the country before being 'reunited' with his family.
His misfortune is described as a "tragic event" by a reporter who looks like a sane and sensible grown-up, but who seems pathologically obsessed with the minutiae of this man's short hospital visit - the ashen-faced reporter even speculates over whether there will be crackers left on the family Christmas tree for the returning grandfather to pull.
The second story is of a young student who has been shot at point-blank range in a random, motiveless murder. His family say they have "lost faith in everything".
The alien will scratch his head and assume the stuff he'd heard about the BBC being the pinnacle of journalism was just an interplanetary myth.
And he'd be right.