Belfast Telegraph

Strictly: Coffee-flavoured Revel not to everyone's taste as Jeremy's challenge withers on the vine

By Billy Weir

I think we know each other well enough now for me to share more intimate details with you and I don't mind confessing that I'm rather partial to a bag of Revels.

Nothing outlandish in that I admit, but when I say that my favourite is the coffee one then that divides the crowd right away and you are looked at with a measure of suspicion, surprise and sympathy.

And in many ways - go with me on this - Jeremy Vine has been the coffee sweetie in Strictly's mixed bag of loveliness, but in the world of Revels roulette his luck finally ran out last night.

The Radio Two disc jockey was the last real surprise left in the packet as with only nine dancers remaining the serious business of dancing is taking over..

He was fast becoming the John Sergeant of this series but unlike his BBC colleague he was pushed before he could jump losing out to one of the Loose Woman gaunchettes, Jamelia, in the dance-off.

Vine's quickstep with partner Karen Clifton had about the same grace and elegance as Bernie Clifton and his ostrich, prancing across the stage like a cross between Steve Davis and John Cleese, accompanied by The Jam's Going Underground.

This meant a trip to the London Underground in preparation for his mining-based routine and it was quite handy as he did resemble a bit of a tube later on.

"Excuse the pun, but there were a few minor mistakes," said senior judge Len Goodman, while Bruno Tonioli told him "you've been digging very deep, down to the reserves, but you haven't struck gold yet".

And then it was the turn of everyone's favourite Revel, of the Craig Horwood variety, who had been a mixed bag all night, one minute nasty, the next all sweetness and light, or the raisin and Malteser as I like to think of them.

"It was like being at the national dressage championship, the pony club would have been proud of it," he said, and you got the feeling not many counters would be needed to tot up his score. With this in mind he promised that in next week's live Blackpool show that he 'would be lowered from the ceiling straddling an electric guitar with pyrotechnics spurting from both ends' but with only 21 points and dance-off disappointment to come we have been denied the chance to chalk that off our bucket list.

He wasn't helped on Saturday night having to follow the best dance of the series thus far when Corrie's Georgia May Foote notched up 39 points for her Charleston from Chicago.

"You put the 'go' in Chicago," gushed Len and we were all relieved that there isn't a musical called 'Madras' but I'm not here to provide sordid unpleasantness.

That sort of thing is left to Anita Rani and her partner, Gleb Savchenko, who turned up in a dazzling white number with black piping up the trousers legs that left you feeling that Vladimir Loyal Sons of Vladivostok Flute Band were a member light for band practice.

At least we know who had the orange Revel but more disturbing is that no matter what the routine Countryfile's Rani is hurled about like a startled sheep and ends up looking deep into his, er, Urals.

Elsewhere the highlight was EastEnders' Kellie Bright who was the toffee in the bag, looking to have bitten off more than she could chew when performing a samba to Boom Shake the Room by Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince.

Craig was confused, like someone had slipped a coconut or peanut sweetie back into his bag, commenting "it's completely not my thing whatsoever".

Len concurred, admitting that 'the trouble is I'm a cup of tea in a world of lattes' and my message is simple: embrace the coffee, you might revel in it.

Belfast Telegraph


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