Belfast Telegraph

Hooray the football's over, bring on the beautiful game

By Billy Weir

I don't know about you but I'll be glad for the World Cup to start just so that there will be a bit less football on the box.

A cursory flicking of channels in recent days is sure to have seen you stumble in Danny Welbeck-fashion across something, no matter how tenuously, linked to the upcoming festival of footy in Brazil.

Whether it's a David Beckham desperate not to be recognised in the jungle desperately wanting to be recognised, or Gary Lineker finding a conveniently gorgeous TV presenter to talk him through all things Brazilian, oh, and meeting up with Pele and Ronaldo, then there was something to whet all appetites.

And talking of Ronaldo and Man vs Food, the galloping gorb that is Adam Richman even made a cameo, albeit brief, on Soccer Aid, Brooklyn's (that's a place in New York not the son of someone desperately not wanting to be recognised) finest losing 100lbs to play, about a pound for every second he was on the pitch.

The undoubted highlight was Olly Murs being tripped on the Old Trafford pitch by Jose Mourinho – if only David Moyes had thought of that – while Clarence Seedorf's hat-trick gave the Rest of the World a 4-2 win over England.

That should make up for AC Milan giving him the boot.

Over on Dave, I've spotted a theme where a programme must contain an amusingly odd number and the word 'England' to be deemed fit for broadcast thus we've had England's Top 39 Footy Gaffes, England's Top 19 Footy Heroes and England's 53 Top World Cup Goals. I patiently await Three Ghastly England Games Before They're Home Again.

Of course they're not the only culprit when it comes to sticking unfunny comedians and 'celebrities' on the box, BBC3 and ITV4 have provided a haven for these underprivileged and unloved members of society.

A bit like Soccer Aid but instead all you want to give them is a dig in the bake.

It's a merciful release then that the football is now upon us.

A month of rushing home from work to wait to see Colombia take on Ivory Coast or dandering in bleary-eyed the next day having been glued to the 11.00pm clash between Ecuador and Honduras armed only with a bag of Brazil nuts and a pint of Caipirinha.

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